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 Alright sorry for the long wait everyone. I've been busy with my son's doctors, looking for work and other things that happen in our daily lives. But first let me stop and say there is a lot of unexpected 'common' courtesies, respect and overall niceness. I live in the city of San Antonio and over all it's a big city that still likes to think it's a small town despite ranking among America's top ten big cities. Our metro system of getting around isn't prefect but it's here and it can be a pain for a single mother hauling the stroller on and off the bus. What I've seen even in not-so-crowded buses where people are eager for you to get off the bus, is that people are willing to open the door, hold the baby, or even hold the stroller.

I've found that with others, someone's willing to give up a seat to the elderly even if it's in the back, I've noticed that more often than not that gentlemen hold the back door open for women, elderly and children. I've also found that with profound patience most are willing to wait for the children to sit down before walking further toward the back. Sometimes I'll see a young person willing to help the elderly with bags or the walker.

This surprises me sometimes because its kind of rare to see it sometimes. Everyone's pretty busy with their day and going about their errands or doing whatever they have to do. Yet, they'll stop pick up someone's receipt and yell, 'hey you dropped this!' Or if its of more importance rush after the person to make sure they get whatever they dropped. With Christmas and Winter coming this niceness seems to become even more evident. Just the other day I saw someone who handed someone else a transfer. Said she was gettin' off anyway and didn't want the young woman to become stranded with no way to get home.

Another paid for someone else's bus fare. You might not think that $1.25 or even .15 cents is much but to someone who doesn't make a lot of money or doesn't get enough that's a lot.

I'm still on for my interview with Nationwide tomorrow and I hope I nail it. I'm still waiting for a background check with Indus, an IT firm for the federal government to get back with me. I've applied at 'The Hartford,' and I've also applied at Wells Fargo and some other companies for a nice paycheck of at least 11$ an hour. I'm not willing to go for less, well yes, but in all seriousness. I can't afford less than that.

Moving on into cars, I'm exploring the hatchbacks.

I love them, their compact and sporty. I've been looking into the Chevy Sonic today, went by a dealership, explained that I'm in no way ready to buy or test drive. The salesman was still nice enough to show me the Sonics in-stock and talk about what I was looking for. We exchanged some car knowledge and took a look at Sonics and Cruzes. I liked them both, but fell in love with the Spark.

It's just me and my son so I don't need a huge vehicle. I also don't have money to waste on the sports cars, but knowing that there are nifty little sports packages for the Sonic and Cruze makes me happy but the Spark was very roomy on the inside and while yes there's a little sway when the salesman drove it around the lot. It's a tiny car, in city of Trucks and SUVs, it's gonna sway. Luckily it's not horrible, and the Spark is roomy in the back, which is kinda shocking when you look at it. I call it a clown car because there's no way you'd think anything would fit, and then it does.

I was looking at cars in the B-Spec, which goes to the Sonic, Fiesta, Yaris, Versa, Fit, Rio5, and Mazda2. I may however now look at those and others. I've got appointments with some other dealerships, I'll be heading over to Nissan for a look at the Sentra and Juke since the Versa doesn't sit well with me. I'm working on an appointment to look at the Mazda2, 3 and the Rio5. I'll also be heading over to Ford to look at the Focus and Fiesta, in their Titanium and SE/ST packages. I'll give a status report when it happens! 

Title: Home Coming
Chapters: 1
Fandom: DCU - Pre-OYL, Comics.
Characters: Cassandra Cain & Barbara Gordon
Genre: Drama/Poetic
Rating: PG
Warnings: Christian based poem, based off Gail Simone's thoughts of making Cassandra into the Angel of the Bat.
Words: 1,199
Summary: After going all League of Assassins, Cassandra comes home.

Note this is more of a poem, than anything else....

This fan fiction piece is based on characters owned by DC Comics. This author for anything contained herein will receive no financial compensation. These stories have been written for non-commercial purposes and do not challenge DC Comics' ownership to their properties. No copyright infringement is intended.

Coming Home

A Cassandra Cain Fiction

Cassandra Cain never knew her right from wrongs. Her sanity hangs in the balance on the edge of the surface beneath the proverbial ledge. Does she slip and fall, and take the plunge into the unknown deeds she's yet to do. Her skin is full of oils and holes. She's so deep in the darkness not even they can save her. She wonders why this life has taken this turn, how can she turn it back around did she even have control at all? She once had this life of love and happiness now she knows nothing but sadness and sorrow its this depressing she'd tell you that.

She's the trekker of all treks. She walks this world seeing all the humanity in it. Does she become the wall that everyone runs into? Or will she become the wind and wrap herself around them so they can hear her cry. Death and back again does she live for them, or does she make her own tree in this forest of old. She repents to Him and He says sin no more. She feels relieved but there's more to this than her holding the gun in her hands. The band keeps playing and she keeps feeling that something's missing.

Might she take a breath and be alive again. She walked down those sidewalks in a town she rejected. Her heart is bitter it’s angry and she's facing it head on. All her heroes are waiting on the other side of good. She's just come from the evil and almost became her worst nightmare. How does she make it up to the one woman who took her in, like this heaven sent Saint Barbara, did everything right she made everything seem so easy.

Cassandra Cain walks down the streets of proverbial Gotham City. Rain comes down from the sky. The Lord himself washes away sins like the sacrificial lamb he sent. Her heart is confused as she looks around this town. She's one in a million can anyone hear her cry. Only she can, only Saint Barbara can hear, not Lady Shiva but Saint Barbara.

Her burdens are heavy laden as she turns the corner to a small little alleyway, the hard work she puts into that cardboard box bed. Cassandra Cain has a lot of bad days; it’s been overrated to live her life this way. Even Saint Barbara's friends have a place to eat. Maybe if Cassandra submits herself as a servant she could get treated better. The Lord told of a parable similar, although she doesn't expect a party but she does expect food, and a place to stay.

Her knees creak with every step she makes, and her feet break with every breath she takes. Her body is crying out in pain, and her heart becomes filled with anguish throwing more into the chaos of her mind that plays the scene out. The bus takes her from her proverbial hell, and drives down through the night. She sees three wooden crosses just on the roadside grave. Dave always said, "Jesus is the bread of life." She wanted to know more, how can, she live for eternity and know she would not perish.

So just as she was going down, he came around and saved her, and Jesus became more than just a man, he became her savior, and his name was Dave. For as she read from his blood stained bible, the bible he gave to her as they shot him for his faith. "I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty."

Now the bus stops and she's in this city of a million, a small nobody. No one wanted to get to know her, but she knew only Barbara would care, about every hair on her head. Fading into the background and becoming yesterday's wallpaper, she walks the wet and lonely streets on the boulevard of broken dreams. She never knew what she was trying prove.

Cassandra just knew, that her heart was with Barbara a woman that was more than this Saint who took her in, she was someone that cared about every hair on her head. All her tears and all her fears went away when Barbara a woman who was more than the big sister who consoled her, she was a Mother. She's not perfect. She's so imperfect that she's become the Saint of Imperfections.

Walking down the city sidewalks, the tightness of the night seems to over take her senses and she just wants someone to tell her it'll be alright. Don't think for a minute she's destined to be this way forever, and ever. Cassandra has a mind to be the wayward son who spent all his fortunes and came back home only to be given the blessings of a lifetime. But it’s only the time that binds her to this woman's heart and she comes to this tower that's majestic in all its power light and purity seem to fall around it as if some heavenly halo sat upon it on a nightly basis.

Here she comes going up the road, the words just seem to flow, everything stops and nothing will subside, all her sins are washed away as the rain falls down and everything resumes and now she feels the pressures as she steps into the elevator she hears it whistling humming and she prays that everything will be okay. On the other side of good is this Saint of Imperfections this woman who has long ago said she was grateful for the time she had to spend here on this Earth.

The doors open and reveal that Saint who waited so long, and says. "I thought you had died, but now I see you've merely receded into something I can fix. You're broken in more than words can tell, and I know how hard you fell, and don't worry about it, you’re alive and well, I love you."

Cassandra flung her arms about the Saint of Imperfections, the words the came forth words from her heart and she could not part with it and she replied. "Mom I'm so sorry for all the pain I've caused I just want to live here I'll work for you day and night please forgive me I'll try to make this right."

The Saint of Imperfections smiled at the choice of words and said. "What kind of words are those you're my one and only daughter and I'll make a place for you at my table you will sit and together we will celebrate once was lost is now found, and although you were dead here you are alive and well. Don't worry about a thing, you're my one and only daughter and you have to know I love you. Welcome home."

 

I'm writing again slowly.

I'm still playing Illy, but I'm also getting back into pop culture, comics, movies, games.

It's slow, getting or trying to get back to that life that I once had.

Maybe one day. 

I've been busy playing Illyraid, and not posting! Or writing, but I have a job interview on the 7th of December. A bit of a bitter sweet day then eh?

Anyway...

 So, 

I'm still ready The Cheese Plate by Max McCalu... om I think. Anyway it's still pretty fascinating just how complex the cheese world is, and this also kind of pushed me to look more into my local cheeses and I was shocked to discover that San Antonio does NOT have a cheese monger. Or at least none that I could find through google maybe I'll have to switch search engines. Anyway, the holidays are fast approaching and as such me and a friend did a steam gift exchange.

What is a steam gift exchange?

I send him a gift through steam, an d he sends me a gift through steam.

I got him Left 4 Dead 2, and he got me the STO Starter Pack.

Do I need the STO Starter pack, no, but it was 10$ in the midweek madness sale on Steam and that only means that I get the Steamrunner-class. Yes, the Steamrunner-class my friends. If you don't know it look it up and watch Star Trek: First Contact the opening battle sequence. It's there with the Akira-classes. So I hear it needs work on the shields but that's a Cryptic bug and their fixing it otherwise it's pretty darn good. Not something I'd switch my Eng Main to but my Tac Alt should have fun in it.

 I'm really hoping I get some Zen for X-Mas, seriously I want so much stuff it's not even funny. 

I've been playing Pokemon Omega and it's kinda fun. Same addictiveness as the DS/GB/GBA games. Just a little weird except that the site wasn't up today so... thank god it's free. Anyway, I have several books en route to me from the Library including several Lidia Bastianch books, Bobby Flay, books on Doughnuts, Pizza and some movies that include Beetlejuice. 

I'm planning on attending Dragon*Con 2013 with a friend,  whole trip is gonna cost a pretty penny so let's hope I can get it all done before next con. I'll be turning in my application for some culinary job training for the city's food bank, so let's hope I make the Dec 17 class. That'd be a great X-Mas gift for me. I just wanted to check in! 

 I'm in a dead halt on my writing. I have some 34K words but that's mainly it. I should be closer to 40K by now but I don't know. Then I started thinking about Pokemon and DC Comics. To which:

TEAM SEVEN - Writer: Justin Jordan. Artist: Jesus Merino. 
Set in the early days of DC COMICS-THE NEW 52, threads of the entire DC Universe collide. As Superman emerges, so does the world’s counter measures against him and his kind. Team 7 is comprised of Dinah Lance, Amanda Waller, Steve Trevor, John Lynch, Alex Fairchild, Cole Cash and Slade Wilson — and their story will change everything you know about DC COMICS-THE NEW 52. 

WHAT THE FUCK?! Why would Dinah be with Amanda Waller?!?!?!?! AND SLADE WILSON!? WTF!

Anyway, moving on. I totally missed a very important appointment to day because I got lost. Doesn't usually happen but it did because I failed to google ahead of time. So now everything's all fucked up, I have to work again to find a job because there's no way I can take it without daycare. Also thinking about dabbling back into my own DCU.

So, you are all new to my madness but for eight years I had worked at building an entirely new DC Universe. Then the NEW 52 happened, and I stopped. I shouldn't have. My friends like it but then again they are my friends, but then wouldn't true friends tell you your shit sucks and help you fix that? But anyway, yes, I will probably be posting bits and pieces of my last  'Timeline,' here. Timeline helps me keep up with stuff. 

I'm going to go try and study. I've failed at doing that the past few days. I should at least attempt to get to chapter ten before turning my Network+ book back into the library. 

So.

I finally saw the Avengers. I like the Hulk. He's funny.

Any way, I so put together a new computer build. I do that. When I day dream about having AN AWESOME COMPUTER, again. I've built awesomness in the past but have had to sell them to get by and survive. I don't want that to happen this time. I will cry, and cry and cry if that happens again. I'm going to work for like five weeks and then stop and work again for temp doing Tax Prep but hopefully with that experience I can go work for like H&R Block or something. Anything is better than nothing.

I got my Linux+ from the Library so now I have that and Network+ which I conquered the monster known as chaper seven! I'm now on the wonderful world of routing. It's damn near fifty pages but I'm hoping to break into the second half of the book by thursday and be in chapter eleven by Saturday.

Did I mention I am building a new PC?

Yeah. Skyrim, ME3, and all the games I haven't been able to play. Hell yeah.

Counter Strike: GO, here I come! Maybe my clan's CSS server will be less crowded, not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.

So what other games have I missed this year? I mean seriously I've only cared about Skyrim and ME3, and well I'll get a INintendo DSi and play Pokemon of course but, what did I miss?

Anyway I'm gonna go drool over more computer parts!

 It happened.

The creative/study wall has been hit. The wall where you say nope, I refuse to do anything and will just bullshit my way through the day. That day is here. It shouldn't be I need to be working on my novel, and finishing up that damned chapter seven regarding TCP/IP basics and moving into the Wonderful World of Routing. I kid you not that is the title of chapter eight and it seems to go on forever. I do mean forever. 

If you are paying attention to my journal. Yes, I'm going through different styles. Haven't found one that fits me quite yet, and without access to the Adobe Suite. I can't customize mine. I would rather like to have a Star Trek Online theme. Which I'll probably work on once I get Adobe Cloud, you know where I can have access to a shit ton of Adobe products for a relatively decent price.

In other news, I have a work from home job offer and am looking into the University of Phoenix. It's a split shift, seven to twelve, and then five to nine. Which leaves me time to study in between all the while taking care of my kid.

I'm certainly looking into their associates field. Then go back to my community college and do an associates there, and if you're wondering why don't I just go to the community college let's say been there done that, fucked it up. That's all you need to know and because of that I don't have the money to pay them. But yet, yes I am going to looking into for profit colleges and further get myself into debt for the sake of education. 

It's either that or pay 250$ for a test that I could very well fail. I don't think I will but I'd like to have some sort of reassurance that no I'm not gonna fail the damned Network+. Or the Linux+, or even the Security+ or any other subsequent certification afterward. 

Any who better at least pretend to be trying to get to 32/33K words today!

You might have an idea the feeling I have right now. 30,014 words. I did it. In one single month I was able to write 30,000 words. I feel beyond happy. Ecstatic although not externally expressing it. I feel very, very accomplished. On top of this. I was able to finish up chapter six of the Network+ book that I have. Physical Installation. I probably know all I need to know for physical installation, I mean I had practiced it during job corps. Well at least the UTP Installation, doing a 100BaseT Network with Cat5e. Making the cables, and grabbing them from the drop, connecting them to the jacks, using the punchdown tool. Putting the wires into the 110-punchdown block. 

But man, I feel way happy about this. I'm sorry I'm not gonna shut up. This is the first time I've ever done something like this, and the first time that I feel so dedicated to a single story. A single novel. On top of this I started reading Star Trek: Titan, Taking Wing last night. First time I've ever read this, or any well. I've read previous Star Trek novels before. ST LE, Well of Souls with Rachel Garret. I had read a repvious TNG book but wasn't satisfied with it. But this, I am way happy with.

I have to keep reminding myself that I am only writing a rough draft and I have to finish this rough draft before going back over for Grammar, Character Voice/Development, Plot Development./Story Continuity, etc, etc. Still, still! Wow, I just wow. Now it's time to reset my goal chart and put me back at zero so tomorrow when November starts. I will start with zero and keep on plugging away at this novel and keep writing. Keep writing, keep writing.

Hell, I've been juggling names around for the second novel. But that's just me. I jump ahead of myself. A lot. It's a bad thing and a good thing I guess. I'm still so stoked this is way better than hitting level fifty on Star Trek Online. Anyway I just wanted to share that I made it and I also wanted to say Happy Halloween. 

This year me and my little Yoda will have a lot of fun! 

For the past week, ever since I received my Network+ book from the Library. I've been putting the pedal to the metal. Going from chapter one to five in a week, well I'm not done with five. Still in five. Because there's something about you Ethernet and having seen it for so long.

I thought we needed to see other words for at least a few hours. It's not that I don't like you, you see. It's just that you're a little clingy, and you're everywhere.

Honestly Ethernet.

It's a little annoying. I know you're important, I do, my whole test is devoted to your abilities, and what you do with data on Networks. I get it. I do.

But really, I just wish I had the money to build my Lightweight Gaming computer, although preferably I'd take the Heavyweight. Something about a Hex Core is just really attractive, all that power, all that speed. Yeah. I just want to play Star Trek Online, and geek out over the stupidest stuff.

In fact, I want to play Counter Strike. Something, something to break this thing called studying, and to take me away from you Ethernet.

Sincerely,

So-not-connected.